Top 449 Tom Robbins Quotes (Updated June 2023)

Explore a treasure trove of wisdom and insight from Tom Robbins through their most impactful and thought-provoking quotes and sayings. Broaden your horizons with their inspiring words and share these beautiful quote pictures from Tom Robbins with your friends and followers on popular social media platforms such as Facebook, Twitter, or your personal blog - all free of charge. Delve into our collection of the top 449 Tom Robbins quotes, handpicked for you to discover and share with others.

Their kiss was like a paper airplane landing on the moon. By Tom Robbins

It was quite likely the best advice I've ever received. I can't help but wonder what my life would have been like if I'd actually followed it. By Tom Robbins

My heart is a Latin American food stall and your love is a health inspector from Zurich. By Tom Robbins

It's good to bear in mind that like it or not, enlightenment has always been, even in a golden age, pretty much limited to an elite. By Tom Robbins

Heaven is living in your hopes and Hell is living in your fears. It's up to each individual which one he chooses. By Tom Robbins

Behind that rough facade, customers drank beer and danced, activities that to any good Southern Baptist invoked the Devil himself. By Tom Robbins

The beauty of simplicity is the complexity it attracts. By Tom Robbins

Sometimes one gets the idea that life thinks it's still living in Paris in the thirties. By Tom Robbins

Sometimes one gets the feeling that life still thinks it's living in Paris in the '30s. By Tom Robbins

Individualism is bad for business - though absolutely necessary for freedom, progressive knowledge, and any possible interface with the transcendent. By Tom Robbins

Whether a man is a criminal or a public servant is purely a matter of perspective. By Tom Robbins

If love eats the donut, does time eat the hole? By Tom Robbins

Let us live for the beauty of our own reality. By Tom Robbins

Live the beauty or your own reality. By Tom Robbins

The sky was the color of Edgar Allen Poe's pajamas. By Tom Robbins

But do we know how to make love stay?'I can't even think about it. The best I can do is play it day by day. By Tom Robbins

Switters had always seemed to take a both/and approach to life, as opposed to the more conventional and restrictive either/or. By Tom Robbins

Don't talk about it - you'll talk it away. Let the ideas flow from your mind to the page without exposing them to air. Especially hot air. By Tom Robbins

When freedom is outlawed, only outlaws will be free. By Tom Robbins

Any half-awake materialist well knows - that which you hold holds you. By Tom Robbins

There is a similarity between juggling and composing on the typewriter. The trick is, when you spill something, make it look like a part of the act. By Tom Robbins

The purpose of art is to provide what life does not. By Tom Robbins

I have always been a romantic, one of those people who believes that a woman in pink circus tights contains all the secrets of the universe. By Tom Robbins

If I have been given any gift in this life, it's my ability to live simultaneously in the rational world and the world of imagination. By Tom Robbins

Hard times and funky living can season the soul, true enough, but joy is the yeast that makes it rise. By Tom Robbins

How can men be such lummoxes, such wads of chewing gum on our ballet slippers and still feel so good? By Tom Robbins

This is the room where Jezebel frescoed her eyelids with history's tragic glitter By Tom Robbins

Salvation is for the feeble, that's what I think. I don't want salvation, I want life, all of life, the miserable as well as the superb. By Tom Robbins

Originality is a myth perpetuated by the naive, the romantic, and the unscrupulous. By Tom Robbins

John Irving once told me he doesn't start a novel until he knows the last sentence. I said, 'My God, Irving, isn't that like working in a factory?' By Tom Robbins

(I recommend that you make all of your major moves on the first of April. Just in case.) By Tom Robbins

When we accept bad art because it's good politics, we're killing the swan to feed the chickens. By Tom Robbins

They say that February is the shortest month, but you know they could be wrong. By Tom Robbins

The only authority I respect is the one that causes butterflies to fly south in fall and north in springtime. By Tom Robbins

Family trouble was the worst kind. Some families ran their own little versions of the Middle East. By Tom Robbins

Most people do not have the guts to direct their own movie - let alone star in it. By Tom Robbins

What we have here is an unexpected touchdown on the runway of the heart. By Tom Robbins

The highest function of love is that it makes the loved one a unique and irreplaceable being. By Tom Robbins

...if we aren't learning something from a new experience, it's usually because we aren't paying attention. Or we're following the wrong libretto. By Tom Robbins

There are two lost continents ... We are one: the lovers. By Tom Robbins

Morels are ugly in the skillet. The caps look like the scrotums of leprechauns, the stems like the tusks of fetal elephants. By Tom Robbins

The mission of the artist in an over-technologi zed society, is to call the old magic back to life. By Tom Robbins

What an electric heater perched upon the rim of the bathtub of the world that dead Jesus was. By Tom Robbins

Peeple of zee wurl, relax By Tom Robbins

You know what the game of golf is, don't you? It's basketball for people who can't jump and chess for people who can't think. By Tom Robbins

There are no such things as synonyms!" he practically shouted. "Deluge is not the same as flood. By Tom Robbins

We use so much bad language that it forms a barrier between ourselves and the truth. By Tom Robbins

I began to hitchhike in something akin to geological time: slow, ancient, vast. By Tom Robbins

This is not the first time that intimidation by typewriter has caused me to consider the pen. By Tom Robbins

Claude could simply not imagine the couples he met at parties or passed on the street ever being locked in carnal embrace. By Tom Robbins

You dig me, don't you? A little boy, he can play like he's a fireman or a cop By Tom Robbins

Alone, the world offers itself freely to us. To be unmasked, it has no choice. By Tom Robbins

As they say in my country, have a nice day. By Tom Robbins

Love is very powerful, but it has limits and it's a costly mistake to spread it too thin. By Tom Robbins

He worked too hard, smiled too little and dined as one indifferent to both flavor and fate; he clearly was a hero in need of rescue by a princess. By Tom Robbins

Be careful what goes into your mouth and what comes out of it. By Tom Robbins

Oh, I thought that this day and age you maybe would be known as bovine custodial officers. By Tom Robbins

I'll follow him to the ends of the earth,' she sobbed. Yes, darling. But the earth doesn't have any ends. Columbus fixed that. By Tom Robbins

Marx Marvelous is going to break the genius machine when he grows up. That's what everyone said. He hasn't, of course. By Tom Robbins

My faith is whatever makes me feel good about being alive. If your religion doesn't make you feel good to be alive, what the hell is the point of it? By Tom Robbins

They've built their nests in the chimneys of my heart: those swallows that you lost. By Tom Robbins

Breathe properly. Stay curious. And eat your beets. By Tom Robbins

Salvador Dali and fifty cents will get you a cup of clock melt. By Tom Robbins

Never be afraid to love, not even when there's a chance you're not being loved in return. By Tom Robbins

Using words to describe magic is like using a screwdriver to cut roast beef. By Tom Robbins

Of the Seven Dwarfs, the only one who shaved was Dopey. That should tell us something about the wisdom of shaving. By Tom Robbins

God says, "the check's in the mail. By Tom Robbins

You mean you would have me blow up something just because I didn't approve of it? What do you think I am, a vandal? A fascist? A fucking critic? By Tom Robbins

It was a bright, defrosted, pussy-willow day at the onset of spring, and the newlyweds were driving cross-country in a large roast turkey. By Tom Robbins

To eliminate the agitation and disappointment of desire, we need but awaken to the fact that we have everything we want and need right now. By Tom Robbins

There have been cans of dog food more splendiferous than South Richmond. Land mines more tender. By Tom Robbins

I love hot hand of explosion. I love a breeze perfumed with the devil smell of powder. By Tom Robbins

Since the Goddess always has been honored in sacred groves, it is understandable that patriarchs, then as now, leaned toward deforestation. By Tom Robbins

I would only read the novels that people classify as 'beach books' if I were being held prisoner and the only alternative was the 'Book of Mormon.' By Tom Robbins

Long as you're not afraid, nobody can run your life for you. Remember that. Hell is being scared of things. By Tom Robbins

Outlaws, like lovers, poets, and tubercular composers who cough blood onto piano keys, do their finest work in the slippery rays of the moon. By Tom Robbins

You may tell the greatest lies and wear a brilliant disguise, but you can't escape the eyes of the one who sees right through you. By Tom Robbins

Meditation ... dissolves the mind. It erases itself. Throws the ego out on its big brittle ass. By Tom Robbins

Hemingway and Norman Mailer might have disagreed, but there is no heavyweight champion of literature. By Tom Robbins

Time, in his view, was a short, sloppy path from Eve's crayon box to the Messiah's fire box. By Tom Robbins

The ultimate end of any ideology is totalitarianism. By Tom Robbins

Fire is the reuniting of matter with oxygen. If one bears that in mind, every blaze may be seen as a reunion, an occasion of chemical joy. By Tom Robbins

Your petal from the salty rose By Tom Robbins

The ugly may be beautiful, the pretty never. By Tom Robbins

Oh, never trust a country That won't permit live poultry to ride on the bus. By Tom Robbins

Though February lay about her shoulders like a cloak of lead. By Tom Robbins

Out of sight of hair smoke and lip ash and bowel cinders, By Tom Robbins

They called her a disgrace to the nurturing traditions of womankind. They threatened to paint a mustache on her and shoot off her nipples. By Tom Robbins

The function of the artist is to provide what life does not. By Tom Robbins

Nothing is implied here. Except the possibility that everything is connected. By Tom Robbins

You knows dat in New Orleans is not morning 'til dee sun come up. By Tom Robbins

Every day is Judgement Day. Always has been. Always will be. By Tom Robbins

But man by his nature is an unnatural animal. If any creature stands a chance of defeating death, it is man. By Tom Robbins

It's personal freedom, not hundred dollar bills that lights the soul's cigar. By Tom Robbins

Spring has a way of erasing doubt. By Tom Robbins

Perhaps sound carries farther across time than across space. By Tom Robbins

Here's an idea: let's get over ourselves, buy a cherry pie, and go fall in love with life. By Tom Robbins

Anyone who maintains absolute standards of good and evil is dangerous. As dangerous as a maniac with a loaded revolver. By Tom Robbins

He who jokes in the executioners face can be destroyed, but never defeated. By Tom Robbins

Street Crime is the only logical response to America's drug policy just as terrorism is the only logical response to America's foreign policy By Tom Robbins

If God didn't prefer for us to drink at night, he wouldn't have made neon! By Tom Robbins

The world is a very strange place,and the dice are always rolling By Tom Robbins

Well, there's one thing to be said for money. It can make you rich. By Tom Robbins

Sissy dear. Your thumbs. HOLLYWOOD SPECTACULAR. LAS VEGAS. THE ROSE BOWL. Larger than any one man's desire. By Tom Robbins

It was 843 B.C.. The year the patriarchs won the pennant. By Tom Robbins

People of ze wurl, relax! By Tom Robbins

You're better equipped for this world than I am," she said. "I'm always trying to change the world. You know how to live in it. By Tom Robbins

Anything that says Yes to life is automatically saying No to war. By Tom Robbins

I've begun to picture my abdominal cavity occupied instead by a single glowing globe, By Tom Robbins

I'm probably more interested in sentences than anything else in life. By Tom Robbins

It's no wonder people lack romance in their lives, love belongs to those who are willing to go to extremes for it. By Tom Robbins

Can a woman who does not know the contents of her handbag know the contents of her heart? By Tom Robbins

There's a certain Buddhistic calm that comes from having ... money in the bank. By Tom Robbins

Of the seven deadly sins, lust is definitely the pick of the litter. By Tom Robbins

There is no death. There are only different levels of life. By Tom Robbins

Love is dope, not chicken soup. By Tom Robbins

I like travelers, but I don't like tourists. The difference is that travelers don't shop and they don't play golf. By Tom Robbins

Tilli stroked her Chihuahua. Max's heart made a sound like the sleigh bells on Mrs. Santa Claus's dildo. By Tom Robbins

Half Asleep in Frogg pajamas. By Tom Robbins

Logic only gives man what he needs," he stammered. "Magic gives him what he wants. By Tom Robbins

Someone once commented that I have a great thirst for knowledge, to which I replied, What the hell? I'll drink anything. By Tom Robbins

Sentimental memories were like sugar-water icicles. By Tom Robbins

Now, in the eyes of the stars, men may be no more exalted than beasts, and kingly men no worthier than the wretched. By Tom Robbins

Okay, it is what it is and I am what I it, but its isness and my itness seem to be stretching the meaning of "is" and "it. By Tom Robbins

Are you aware that rushing toward a goal is a sublimated death wish? It's no coincidence we call them 'deadlines. By Tom Robbins

To live fully, one must be free, but to be free one must give up security. Therefore, to live one must be ready to die. How's that for a paradox? By Tom Robbins

Always compare yourself to the best. Even if you never measure up, it can't help but make you better. By Tom Robbins

There is a sense in which a painted stick is a stick in bloom. This stick points to the hidden face of God. Sometimes it points to you. By Tom Robbins

Rap music ... sounds like somebody feeding a rhyming dictionary to a popcorn popper. By Tom Robbins

If it weren't for Phoenician blinds, it'd be curtains for all of us. By Tom Robbins

Listen, I've been sick ever since I started working here, but today I'm well and I won't be in anymore. By Tom Robbins

It's never too late to have a happy childhood. By Tom Robbins

A child's mind is its living room; it's is going to be residing there for the rest of its earthly existence. By Tom Robbins

He said that when you're locked up, smoking a cigarette is like having a friend. By Tom Robbins

We entertain the immortals in order that they might be persuaded to help us recover the strength and unity stolen from us by death. By Tom Robbins

They caressed one another until their hides shone. They embraced until their 206 bones squeaked like mice. Their bed was a boat in a weird sea. By Tom Robbins

Above all, have a good time. If you aren't enjoying writing it, you can hardly expect someone else to enjoy reading it. By Tom Robbins

The sky is as gruff as a Chinese waiter. It keeps slamming the silverware against the horizon. By Tom Robbins

The notion of life implies a certain absoluteness of self-enjoyment By Tom Robbins

The party in Alobar's head, which agitation and anxiety were throwing, now was crashed by a notion: existence can be rearranged. By Tom Robbins

Our world isn't made of earth, air and water or even molecules and atoms; our world is made of language. By Tom Robbins

Only the young and the beautiful should be allowed to fuck. By Tom Robbins

Time brought along its secretary, memory, and space brought its brat, loneliness. By Tom Robbins

They were straining so desperately for admission to paradise that they had forgotten that paradise had always been their address. By Tom Robbins

This program is subject to change often unexpectedly, sometimes in the batting of an eye. It's the best argument I know against suicide. By Tom Robbins

At the typewriter you find out who you are. By Tom Robbins

Our great human adventure is the evolution of consciousness. We are in this life to enlarge the soul, liberate the spirit, and light up the brain. By Tom Robbins

The dinosaurs died so that chat rooms may flourish By Tom Robbins

So it was that neither for the first time nor the last my verbal mojo, my knack for the written word, served to save my reckless ass. By Tom Robbins

There is no such thing as a weird human being, It's just that some people require more understanding than others. By Tom Robbins

The first time that she spread her legs for him it had been like opening her jaws for the dentist. By Tom Robbins

To perform without a net is ecstasy." Papa Phom had often reminded her, "To perform without focus is fatal. By Tom Robbins

Wit and playfulness represent a desperately serious transcendence of evil. Humor is both a form of wisdom and a means of survival. By Tom Robbins

Muddy Waters he play in the river Joan Rivers she play in the mud Swami guru play in a big salad bowl Counting lettuce and chewing his cud By Tom Robbins

Some folks hide, and some folks seek, and seeking, when it's mindless, neurotic, desperate, or pusillanimous can be a form of hiding. By Tom Robbins

Now I'd fallen into it like a drunk hobo falling into a vat of champagne. By Tom Robbins

There are people in this world who can wear whale masks and people who cannot, and the wise know to which group they belong. By Tom Robbins

Leave it to a naive world-saver like you to view our love as a Sacred Cause when in actual fact all it was was some barking at the moon. By Tom Robbins

The winter passed as slowly and peacefully as a boa constrictor digesting a valium addict. By Tom Robbins

Words on a page can hypnotize you if the rhythm is right By Tom Robbins

(Claude and Marcel LeFever were speaking in French. This simultaneous English translation is being beamed to the reader via literary satellite.) By Tom Robbins

Nobody quite knew what to make of the moon any more. By Tom Robbins

We do know that she's compassionate and eccentric - an excellent combination in a human being; By Tom Robbins

Something has got to hold it together. I'm saying my prayers to Elmer, the Greek god of glue. By Tom Robbins

If being alive is not a virtue, then there is little virtue in virtue. By Tom Robbins

Virtue
Alive

Plato did claim that the unexamined life was not worth living. Oedipus Rex was not so sure. By Tom Robbins

If the novelist isn't surprised by where his book ends up, he or she probably hasn't written anything worth remembering. By Tom Robbins

Brilliantly, ecstatically, irrepressibly. This is the way to burn By Tom Robbins

Maybe most people were fundamentally contradictory. The real people at any rate. By Tom Robbins

Just because you're naked doesn't mean you're sexy. Just because you're cynical doesn't mean you're cool. By Tom Robbins

The moon invented natural rhythm. Civilization uninvented it. By Tom Robbins

Kissing is man's greatest invention. All animals copulate, but only humans kiss. By Tom Robbins

I eat so much mayonnaise they were going to send me to the Mayo Clinic. By Tom Robbins

Civilization is a mutant beast that emerged from the shattered egg of primitive stability.-Sissy Hankshaw By Tom Robbins

In a voice that sounds the way a can of cheap dog food would sound if a can of cheap dog food could speak, he tells you you are looking well. By Tom Robbins

There are smiles that actually travel along telephone wires, although no engineer at Bell Laboratories could explain how it works. By Tom Robbins

You are an ignorant schoolgirl. You think civilization is a good thing. By Tom Robbins

Your author has found love to be the full trip, emotionally speaking; the grand tour: fall in love, visit both Heaven and Hell for the price of one. By Tom Robbins

Our similarities bring us to a common ground; Our differences allow us to be fascinated by each other. By Tom Robbins

Those people who recognise that imagination is reality's master, we call sages, and those who act upon it, we call artists. By Tom Robbins

The brown paper bag is the only thing civilized man has produced that does not seem out of place in nature. By Tom Robbins

Why procrastinate when you can precognitate? By Tom Robbins

Morality depends on culture. Culture depends on climate. By Tom Robbins

A sausage is an image of rest, peace and tranquility in stark contrast to the destruction and chaos of everyday life. By Tom Robbins

There's nothing like the word dangerous to generate interest: it's irresistible to young males, scary to most young females. By Tom Robbins

Of course I'm inconsistent! Only logicians and cretins are consistent! By Tom Robbins

Education is for growth and fulfillment. By Tom Robbins

I am what I it. It is what is is. By Tom Robbins

I'm not infatuated with frivolousness. We're just good friends. By Tom Robbins

Consider the silent repose of the sausage as compared to the aggressiveness of bacon. By Tom Robbins

And while meanness is a function of the insensitive, grumpiness is merely a function of the dissatisfied. By Tom Robbins

An old Ukrainian proverb warns, "A tale that begins with a beet will end with the devil." That is a risk we have to take. By Tom Robbins

At birth, we emerge from dream soup. At death, we sink back into dream soup. In between soups, there is a crossing of dry land. Life is a portage. By Tom Robbins

There's no point in saving the world if it means losing the moon. By Tom Robbins

How could something called 'The Breath of the Ass' help but bring trouble? By Tom Robbins

Nonetheless, the fiery dreams did fade, and inside rooms made of clay and painted blue, sweeter visions were nourished. By Tom Robbins

To practice a religion can be lovely, to believe in one is almost always disastrous. By Tom Robbins

It is better to be small, colorful, sexy, careless, and peaceful ... By Tom Robbins

Danger is to adventure what garlic is to spaghetti sauce. Without it, you just end up with stewed tomatoes. By Tom Robbins

You have to eat your technique. Digest it. It's in your blood, but you're not concerned with it anymore. By Tom Robbins

To emphasize the afterlife is to deny life. To concentrate on heaven is to create hell. By Tom Robbins

They coil around each other, the light and the darkness, and they absorb each other continuously, yet they never cancel each other out. By Tom Robbins

Death is impatient and thoughtless. It barges into your room when you are right in the middle of something, and it doesn't bother to wipe its boots. By Tom Robbins

Our religion, our party, our tribe, our town, our school, our race, our nation. Believe. Belong. Behave. Or Be damned. By Tom Robbins

She thought these thoughts to herself as in her mind's eye she ran naked through the woods, hugging trees. By Tom Robbins

Most novelists write about twisted lives. By Tom Robbins

Far out, Bobby wrote back. Next thing I know, you'll be knitting socks with Whistler's Mother. By Tom Robbins

Eating a raw oyster is like french kissing a mermaid. By Tom Robbins

Like two r's trapped in a spanish songbook, tilli and max lurked in their shoebox castle, waiting to be rolled. By Tom Robbins

When I sit down to write, I just let the goose out of the bottle. By Tom Robbins

So, the scholars are tedious, the experts never see the whole truth of things, still they have their role to play. By Tom Robbins

The most useful thing about art is it's uselessness. By Tom Robbins

To behave as if the thermostats on their imaginations were set permanently on high. By Tom Robbins

That's the value of the artist ... Even when they aren't aware, they're dreaming our dreams for us. By Tom Robbins

Pigeon she strut on the rooftopCockroach he strut on the sink My baby strut down to JerusalemWhere blood is the favorite drink By Tom Robbins

Genius may stand on the shoulders of giants, but it stands alone. By Tom Robbins

Authority is to be ridiculed, outwitted and avoided. By Tom Robbins

Pan is right," he thought. "Death can ruin a man's life even though he go on breathing. By Tom Robbins

When they tell you to grow up, they mean stop growing. By Tom Robbins

Love easily confuses us because it is always in flux between illusion and substance, between memory and wish, between contentment and need. By Tom Robbins

To an artist a metaphor is as real as a dollar. By Tom Robbins

Claude believed that only smart, attractive people had the right to fuck, and it sincerely hurt him when he discovered evidence to the contrary. By Tom Robbins

AS THE AFTERNOON PROGRESSES, our shadows grow longer. At night, in the dark, we become our shadows. By Tom Robbins

To achieve the impossible, it is precisely the unthinkable that must be thought. By Tom Robbins

I have never ever Googled myself; in fact I think the Christian right prohibits such things. By Tom Robbins

Death is simple. Life is messy. Give me life, the more complicated the better. By Tom Robbins

Of our nine planets, Saturn is the one that looks like fun. By Tom Robbins

She needed help, but God was in a meeting whenever she rang. By Tom Robbins

People who sacrifice beauty for efficiency get what they deserve. (Bernard Mickey Wrangle, p 99) By Tom Robbins

My paintings are very strange - large and empty, like walls. Just the opposite of my writing, which is rich and juicy. By Tom Robbins

If the earth needs night as well as day, wouldn't it follow that the soul requires endarkenment to balance enlightenment? By Tom Robbins

Love is the ultimate outlaw. By Tom Robbins

From the outside, my life may look chaotic, but inside I feel like some kind of monk licking an ice cream cone while straddling a runaway horse. By Tom Robbins

The function of the artist,' the Navajo answered, 'is to provide what life does not. By Tom Robbins

Politics is for people who have a passion for changing life but lack a passion for living it. By Tom Robbins

Me? I stand for uncertainty, insecurity, bad taste, fun, and things that go boom in the night. By Tom Robbins

Logic only gives a man what he needs ... Magic gives him what he wants. By Tom Robbins

Not surprisingly, the socks remain silent, as was their legal right. By Tom Robbins

We approach the divine by enlarging our souls and lighting up our brains. By Tom Robbins

Somewhere in the archives of crudest instinct is recorded the truth that it is better to be endangered and free than captive and comfortable. By Tom Robbins

Ellen Cherry understood then that religion was an improper response to the Divine. By Tom Robbins

I sweet potato what I sweet potato. By Tom Robbins

Sweet
Potato

In the end what will prevail is your passion not your tale, for love is the Holy Grail. By Tom Robbins

Can I drink more than one mai tai without taking on the aroma of an aroused butterly? By Tom Robbins

I'd like to think that had I known the truth, I might have been a kinder, more loving person. If only we knew the Truth, mightn't we all? By Tom Robbins

The underworld persists because society needs it, insists upon it, supports it (at the same time that it denies and persecutes it, of course). By Tom Robbins

Elsewhere, they might call the wind Mariah, but here its name was Something Fishy. By Tom Robbins

The sky was the color of Edgar Allan Poe's pajamas. By Tom Robbins

If this typewriter can't do it, then fuck it, it can't be done. By Tom Robbins

Magic things are fond of deceptions. By Tom Robbins

To the domesticated, nomads were an unwelcome reminder of instinct suppressed, liberty compromised, and control unimplemented. By Tom Robbins

Faith is believing in something you know isn't true. By Tom Robbins

You should never hesitate to trade your cow for a handful of magic beans. By Tom Robbins

Those who shun the whimsy of things will experience rigor mortis before death. By Tom Robbins

The way bewilderment lies upon me, I have no need of blanket. In By Tom Robbins

Toys are made in heaven, batteries are made in hell. By Tom Robbins

Was it wife soup and husband soup on the Other Side? Or was it simply soup? By Tom Robbins

The trick is this: keep your eye on the ball. Even when you can't see the ball. By Tom Robbins

Intimacy is the principal source of the sugars which this life is sweetened! By Tom Robbins

true freedom was an internal condition not subject to the vagaries of politics. Freedom could not be owned. Therefore, it could not be appropriated. By Tom Robbins

Western civilization was declining too fast for comfort, but too slowly to be very exciting. By Tom Robbins

Her vulnerability to Wiggs was opening her up (as voluntary vulnerability often can ) in unexpected ways. By Tom Robbins

You are what you think you eat. By Tom Robbins

I am looking for the novelists whose writing is an extension of their intellect rather than an extension of their neurosis. By Tom Robbins

Usually, autobiography is such an indulgence of the ego. By Tom Robbins

Life is hard - if you think it's hard. By Tom Robbins

Hard
Life

Indeed, the first step toward becoming a true outlaw is the refusal to be victimized. By Tom Robbins

The truth, from my perspective, is that the world, indeed, is ending - and is also being reborn. It's been doing that all day, every day, forever. By Tom Robbins

I see you've met Desire and Fulfillment...Regret is in the kitchen making coffee. By Tom Robbins

We're making it up. The world, the universe, life, reality. Especially reality. By Tom Robbins

Christianity ... is an Eastern religion. By Tom Robbins

Just because something didn't happen doesn't mean it isn't true. By Tom Robbins

True
Happen

People tend to take everything too seriously. Especially themselves. By Tom Robbins

People
Tend

A sense of humor ... is superior to any religion so far devised. By Tom Robbins

The will to live cannot be overestimated as a stimulant to longevity. By Tom Robbins

To be or not to be isn't the question. The question is how to prolong being. By Tom Robbins

It is more important to be free than to be happy. By Tom Robbins

Some families ran their own little version of the Middle East. By Tom Robbins

A writer needs a life of introspection. By Tom Robbins

If complexity doesn't beat you, paradox will. By Tom Robbins

True stability results when presumed order and presumed disorder are balanced. By Tom Robbins

My life is not merely a public phenomenon, it is a solitary adventure as well. By Tom Robbins

All dreams continue in the beyond. By Tom Robbins

Religion is not merely the opium of the masses, it's the cyanide. By Tom Robbins

Sissy Hankshaw once taught a parakeet to hitchhike. By Tom Robbins

Leave me in the night but please don't leave me in the dark By Tom Robbins

If it is committed in the name of God or country, there is no crime so heinous that the public will not forgive it. By Tom Robbins

In order to be respected, authority has got to be respectable. By Tom Robbins

Curiosity, especially intellectual inquisitiveness, is what separates the truly alive from those who are merely going through the motions. By Tom Robbins

I like to drink just enough to change the temperature in the brain room. I'll turn to less mainstream substances if I want to rearrange the furniture. By Tom Robbins

And it rained a screaming. And it rained a rawness. And it rained a plasma. And it rained a disorder. By Tom Robbins

Maybe what I admired most about John Steinbeck is that he never mortgaged his 45-acre heart for a suite in an ivory tower. By Tom Robbins

In the life of the individual, an aesthetic sensibility is both more authentic and more commendable than a political or religious one. By Tom Robbins

What looks to be a wisp of cloud is actually the moon, narrow and pale like a paring snipped from a snowman's toenail. By Tom Robbins

a novel that does its own stunts By Tom Robbins

Stunts

Turn a mountain upside down, you have a woman. Turn a woman upside down, you have a valley. Turn a valley upside down, you get folk music. By Tom Robbins

Whatever goes wrong can be used to your advantage, providing it goes wrong enough. By Tom Robbins

Logic limits love, which may be why Descartes never married. By Tom Robbins

Writing is the hardest physical work there is. By Tom Robbins

You wonder if God doesn't have an answering machine to screen out the prayers of the venal and the boring? And in which category has he placed you? By Tom Robbins

There are many things worth living for, a few things worth dying for, and nothing worth killing for. By Tom Robbins

There're many ways, my dear, to victimize people. The most insidious way is to persuade them that they're victims. By Tom Robbins

Naked, she lay sprawled on her side like a shipwrecked cello. By Tom Robbins

I love myself," he said. "But it's unrequited. By Tom Robbins

Never be afraid to make a fool of yourself. The furthest out you can go is the best place to be. By Tom Robbins

Enlightened and endarkened. The ultimate. By Tom Robbins

The kingdom of formal ideas will always be a weak neighbor to the kingdom of thrills By Tom Robbins

The trouble with the fast lane is that all the movement is horizontal. And I like to go vertical sometimes. By Tom Robbins

If you were Jesus with missing years to kill where would you go? By Tom Robbins

It was laughter that might have been squeezed from the tubes of his own darkest heart, then amplified fifty times through the bellows of a loon's ass. By Tom Robbins

It's been said that golf is a Zen activity. I'd argue that if golfers were practicing Zen, they wouldn't keep score. By Tom Robbins

I tell you, that switch from B.C. to A.D. must have driven people nuts. I bet more than a few Israelites missed their dental appointments. By Tom Robbins

Isn't fixity the hallmark of the living dead? By Tom Robbins

Most Americans pay lip service to the idea of freedom, but can't handle real freedom. By Tom Robbins

Human reality is often simultaneously somber and funny. By Tom Robbins

Slang just makes people more stupid, that's all, By Tom Robbins

I believe in nothing, everything is sacred. I believe in everything, nothing is sacred. By Tom Robbins

Sacred

People are never perfect, but love can be. By Tom Robbins

You can hook a rainbow to a goofy vision -Jellybean is doing that- but you can't hook a rainbow to a lie By Tom Robbins

You don't have to be a genius to recognize one. If you did, Einstein would never have gotten invited to the White House. By Tom Robbins

If he's like a lot of men, he'd rather be a murderer than a fool. By Tom Robbins

This lonely, uncompromising, obsessive tug-of-war with presumed reality, this is what art is all about. By Tom Robbins

There's a direct link between the buffalo hunts and Vietnam, said Switters. By Tom Robbins

They fell asleep smiling. It is to erase the fixed smiles of sleeping couples that Satan trained roosters to crow at five in the morning. By Tom Robbins

There are only two mantras, yum and yuck, mine is yum. By Tom Robbins

I may be mad, he thought, but I prefer the shit of this world to whatever sweet ambrosias the next may offer. By Tom Robbins

'Neotenty' is 'remaining young,' and it may be ironic that it is so little known, because human evolution has been dominated by it. By Tom Robbins

I believe in everything; nothing is sacred. I believe in nothing; everything is sacred. Ha Ha Ho Ho Hee Hee. By Tom Robbins

Sacred
Hee

Don't trust anybody who'd rather be grammatically correct than have a good time. By Tom Robbins

Hawaii made the mouth of her soul water. By Tom Robbins

If he weren't a stick his own self, I'd say he had a stick up his butt. By Tom Robbins

Stick
Butt

What if the Christ and the Messiah come, and they're two different guys? By Tom Robbins

We only rise above mediocrity when there's something at stake. p. 174 By Tom Robbins

Beer can lead men to think they're mighty and foul-mouthed women to believe themselves amusing and hip. By Tom Robbins

Language is not the frosting, it's the cake. By Tom Robbins

Sharks are the criminals of the sea. Dolphins are the outlaws. By Tom Robbins

The Impressionists were able to lead the viewer into mixing color in his or her own eye. By Tom Robbins

I rather like the smell of absurdity in the morning. By Tom Robbins

They accepted my donation, so they're aware they'd better serve my interests or I'll buy some leadership that will. By Tom Robbins

In the haunted house of life, art is the only stair that doesn't creak. By Tom Robbins

What was it like in there? Inside a daisy?" My answer: "Like a cathedral made of mathematics and honey. By Tom Robbins

Cries for help are frequently inaudible. By Tom Robbins

[R]ed hair is slow to lay back once it's got its dandruff up, and her bitchy mood required further opportunity to express itself. By Tom Robbins

THE SKY IS MORE IMPERSONAL than the sea. By Tom Robbins

The rougher the world gets around me, the sweeter I seem to myself. By Tom Robbins

If you want to make a name for yourself, the oldest trick in the book is to attack what everybody else reveres. By Tom Robbins

Men live by embedding themselves in ongoing systems of illusion. Religion. Patriotism. Economics. Fashion. That sort of thing. By Tom Robbins

Meet me in Cognito, baby. In Cognito, we'll have nothing to hide. By Tom Robbins

Disbelief in magic can force a poor soul into believing in government and business. By Tom Robbins

Yet, when struck at a particular angle by a flicker of candlelight from the chandelier, its heart of wine-drenched velvet shone through. By Tom Robbins

Survival is not important. What matters is how you survive. By Tom Robbins

People aren't trees, so it is false when they speak of roots. By Tom Robbins

Summer had come to sit on New York's face. By Tom Robbins

Jackson Pollock said once, "I don't really feel that many people in this world are alive." He said, "That's why I like you, Tom. You're alive." By Tom Robbins

Birth and death were easy. It was life that was hard. By Tom Robbins

Don't be outraged, be outrageous. By Tom Robbins

Fear limits love By Tom Robbins

The wind had its arms around them. The sea dandled them on its knee. By Tom Robbins

Size is important, no matter what our apologist sisters say. By Tom Robbins

Smoking cigarettes is as intimate as we can become with fire without immediate excruciation. By Tom Robbins

I don't think I've ever felt more disoriented and alone. Or more thoroughly, serenely, at home. Every true romantic will know what I mean. By Tom Robbins

The enemy is the tyranny of the dull mind. By Tom Robbins

We are our own dragons as well as our own heroes, and we have to rescue ourselves from ourselves. By Tom Robbins

He was as nervous as a praying mantis at an atheists' picnic ... By Tom Robbins

It is what it is. You are what you it. There are no mistakes. By Tom Robbins

Mistakes

Does koala bear poop smell like cough drops? By Tom Robbins

This is the room of the wolfmother wallpaper. By Tom Robbins

Redheads are said to be children of the moon, thwarted by the sun and addicted to sex and sugar. By Tom Robbins

Mystery is the face everybody shared before they were born and the joke they'll finally get after they're dead. By Tom Robbins

Normality is the Great Neurosis of civilization. By Tom Robbins

Not only is religion divisive and oppressive, it is also a denial of all that is divine in people; it is a suffocation of the soul. By Tom Robbins

As you know, I've been sick and stupid for a long time. I have a lot to make up for, By Tom Robbins

The loony legacy of money was that the arithmetic by which things were measured had become more valuable than the things themselves. By Tom Robbins

So, it was to the pay phone that she descended, bearing the coin of the realm. By Tom Robbins

Those who willingly accept being conned are as corrupt as those who con them. By Tom Robbins

Human folly does not impede the turning of the stars. By Tom Robbins

I think science has begun to demonstrate that aging is a disease. If it is, it can be cured. By Tom Robbins

Since moving to New York, she had been gradually abandoning her old ideas about the nobility of suffering. By Tom Robbins

Solace? That's why God made fermented beverages and the blues. By Tom Robbins

I like to think of myself as a fiction writer who liked art enough to write about it for a while, and then went on to his fiction. By Tom Robbins

His voice wore no pants. By Tom Robbins

Existence can be rearranged. A man can be many things. I am special and free. And the world is round round round. By Tom Robbins

Anarchy is like custard cooking over a flame; it has to be constantly stirred or it sticks and gets heavy, like government. By Tom Robbins

Be your own flying saucer! Rescue yourself! By Tom Robbins

It's hard to say who's a greater threat to the world, an ambitious CEO with a big ad budget or a crafty cleric with an obsolete Bible verse. By Tom Robbins

Approfondement is a French word that means 'playing easily in the deep.' By Tom Robbins

The more advertising I see, the less I want to buy. By Tom Robbins

The only question is how to make love stay. By Tom Robbins

Never trust anyone who uses the word party as a verb but never trust anyone who would rather be grammatically correct than to party. By Tom Robbins

If a girl wants to grow up to be a cowgirl, she ought to be able to do it, or else this world ain't worth living in. By Tom Robbins

And what would our ideas of God, of religion, be like if they had come to us through the minds of women? Ever think of that? By Tom Robbins

When we accept small wonders, we qualify ourselves to imagine great wonders. By Tom Robbins

Every smoker is an embodiment of Prometheus, stealing fire from the gods and bringing it on back home. By Tom Robbins

Should you fail to pilot your own ship, don't be surprised at what inappropriate port you find yourself docked. By Tom Robbins

Eighty percent of love is smell. By Tom Robbins

if this typewriter cant do it fuck it By Tom Robbins

People write memoirs because they lack the imagination to make things up. By Tom Robbins

The French say that the best part of an affair is going up the stairs. By Tom Robbins

Christians, and some Jews, claim we're in the "end times," but they've been saying this off and on for more than two thousand years. By Tom Robbins

The international situation is desperate, as usual. By Tom Robbins

The price of self-destiny is never cheap, and in certain situations it is unthinkable. By Tom Robbins

As expected, you get his machine. Someday, even the "call of nature" will be answered by a machine. By Tom Robbins

Slavic peoples get their physical characteristics from potatoes, their smoldering inquietude from radishes, their seriousness from beets. By Tom Robbins

Breath Properly, Stay Curious, and Always Eat Your Beets! By Tom Robbins

Reality whistles a different tune underwater. By Tom Robbins

A sudden squawked command caused everyone within earshot to act for a split second as if they were shaking invisible martinis By Tom Robbins

Everyone knows that ghosts don't piss! By Tom Robbins

Piss
Ghosts

There was a marvelous, dark lyricism in his voice, the kind of defiance that is rooted in deep loneliness. By Tom Robbins

I asked Mr. Wrangle what you were like. He said you were hornet juice and rosebuds in a container of gazelle meat. By Tom Robbins

A hamburger is an icon of layered circles, the circle being at once the most spiritual and the most sensual of shapes. By Tom Robbins

red hair is caused by sugar and lust. By Tom Robbins

Tunnel vision is caused by an optic fungus that multiplies when the brain is less energetic than the ego. It is complicated by exposure to politics. By Tom Robbins

A spirit cannot soar with only one wing. By Tom Robbins

She thought of the things that lovely young women usually think about when they are relaxing in treetops and unhampered by underwear. By Tom Robbins

We are seldom as limited as we think we are. By Tom Robbins

Every daydream that involves the past sports in its hatband a ticket to the grave. By Tom Robbins

There are stories still in existence that I wrote when I was five. However, I did not get published until I was seven. By Tom Robbins

The beet must have been out of the ground a week or more, for it had the ashen exterior of a cancer victim. By Tom Robbins

I mean that gods do not limit men. Men limit men. By Tom Robbins

Every time a person goes to the mall, she loses a little piece of her soul By Tom Robbins

Don't confuse symmetry with balance. By Tom Robbins

It had been reported that Tanuki fell from the sky using his scrotum as a parachute. By Tom Robbins

Minds were made for blowing. By Tom Robbins

Transformation, liberation and celebration are the themes of all my novels. By Tom Robbins

(a hangover without a head to torment is like a philanthropist without an institution to endow), By Tom Robbins

I've decided to take advantage of outsourcing. My next novel will be written by a couple of guys in Bangalore, India. By Tom Robbins

The full moon - the mandala of the sky. By Tom Robbins

I am cheerful. I don't know if I'm happy. There is a difference, you know. By Tom Robbins

Almost any object, including this book you hold, can turn up as Exhibit A in a murder trial. By Tom Robbins

Gods and men create one another, destroy one another, though by different means. By Tom Robbins

Not naive,' Conch shell had corrected him. 'He simply has not been taught to fear the things you fear. By Tom Robbins

A lot of aspiring writers are all ready to write a novel, but they don't know how to write sentences. By Tom Robbins

There are essential and inessential insanities. The later are solar in character, the former are linked to the moon. By Tom Robbins

Is that man's fate: to spend his closest hours to truth longing for a lie? By Tom Robbins

Reality is contradictory. And it's paradoxical. By Tom Robbins

Matters are very seldom all black or white. They can even be both at the same time - The Beer Fairy By Tom Robbins

This cave within a cave, this paleolithic pussy, this decent into the deepest dark of fuck. By Tom Robbins

Funny how we think of romance as always involving two, when the romance of solitude can be ever so much more delicious and intense. By Tom Robbins

The scientist keeps the romantic honest, and the romantic keeps the scientist human. By Tom Robbins

Outlaws are not members of society. However, they may be important to society. By Tom Robbins

The gods have chosen to entertain me with chronic eyestrain headaches. Very poisonous episodes. So I don't do a lot of reading anymore except on tape. By Tom Robbins